Well, another day and another dollar [well .32 cents after taxes]...week is over for me and I am now in the capable clutches of the woman I live with. Yes, I do want to be here. She cares very deeply for me and thinks that I am the greatest person in the world at times. Notice that I said "at times." There are days though that make her want to put a pillow over me while I sleep and wait for the struggling to stop. I told her when we moved in together that I was a real pain in the ass to live with as I am grumpy in the mornings, grouchy in the afternoon and I am moody all night long. She did not care...either that or she is completely blinded by my infinite charms...YEAH Right! Ha ha.
One night not too long ago...My wife awakens with a dream and is extremely mad at me. I don't usually pay her no never mind because dreams are just that, dreams. I am an educated man, so I know a bit about psychology and the sub-conscious. I ask her why she is upset with me and this is what I am told.
"I got angry with you because in my dream you and I had decided to allow you to have another girl in your life."
Now of course, I am thinking Hell to the yeah! I could try to handle that but do I tell her this...of course not. I am like I said, "educated." I simply ask her what happened and she went into details about how since I have this little school girl crush on me from a neighbor [that I am no way going to pursue] and my best friend is being torn in two by two females vying for his attentions, she dreamed that I was going to do something similar. To top it off, she said that I brought said other female to our house, sat on our couch right in front of her and started making out with this other girl right in her presence. I know I did not get "asshole" tattooed on my forehead recently. So basically, she got jealous over a dream. And angry at me for actions I took in her dream....HER DREAM!
First off, I am in no way that freaking ballsy, arrogant nor gifted. Secondly, I can barely keep up with one woman let alone two. Lastly, it was a damned dream! And it was not even my dream. If it had been I may have awoken very frisky thinking, I AM THE MAN!!!! But no I was awoken by the murmurs of my wife thinking out loud about her dream and a scowl on her otherwise very kissable face.
Remember this dear reader....it was her dream. Did I mention that?
So needless to say, I apologized for something that I had not even done. I was not in any fault but it has been my best defense to remember that I am the man in the relationship. As a man, I know that whether we are or not wrong, we are always the one to apologize because we are all "sorry sacks of shit." Thank you MP for the use of your favorite phrase. This just goes to show you that women are the controllers of men. More on this later but we are all being beckoned by them to do their bidding. Oh you may think you are not but you are. If you are single, you are trying to get one to be with you...or do things for you. If you are in a new relationship, you are still trying to feel her out to see where she will allow you to get away with. If you are in a long term relationship like I am, well....it is too late. I am lost. But being lost is not all that bad. Because there are the nights when I just want to hold someone and her be there when I awake. Provided she is not standing there with a butchers knife and a scowl on her face due to her own over active sub conscious. Otherwise, it is nice to have someone there. Until next time dear readers...until next time.
Mr. Edd
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